Thursday, January 29, 2015

Blue Monday Accidents Happen

Did you know that this past monday was Officially Blue Monday? Yes, the day that is purported to be the most depressing day of the year. All based on some scientific rationale and or mathematical equation. Regardless the reason, I believe I am suffering the lingering effects of Blue Monday. Either it is that or the underlying feeling that this is Winter and I am fighting off the SADs (seasonal affective disorder).

In the past, I had the girls in my creative department to cheer me up with their tails… I meant their tales. Lunchtime chatter often led to the subject of sharing stories of unintentional embarrassment. As much as the girls were visibly embarrassed by these non-coerced confessions they always enjoyed sharing. I never really figured out if part of that enjoyment was simply telling the stories or telling the stories in my presence, as the only male representative, and if it was all simply part of them playing coy.

There is nothing like an instant mood lifter than hearing of wind blown skirts, or the accidental backside ripping of tight dresses or being caught semi-nude by roommates; all especially mood elevating if you know the girls first hand in such stories.

I have been meaning to share some of those stories, but today I am looking for tales of embarrassment from you, my dear readers. Ladies, who's willing to share? 

Not convinced? 
OK, I will go first. Since I had a part in it, I will start you off with this simple story 


  Tammy was on her way out to a night dancing with friends. Having rushed home from work, she was quickly showered, dressed in club clothes fresh out of the wash, new shoes and hair done up just right; she was ready to turn heads! Her sexiness was radiating as she drove out for a memorable night of dancing. On her way out she decided to drop by the drive-through Starbucks for an extra perk for the long drive before the real drinks. 

After the momentary stop, she continued on her way to meet her friends on the outskirts of the city when she inevitably came across Friday night stop and go traffic. Taking a sip from her doubleshot non-fat latte, the car in front of her suddenly stopped and due to her bad tailgating habit she was forced to slam on her brakes. The latte splashed. Fortunately the hot beverage did not make it below or beneath her white blouse and her hot breasts were saved. Unfortunately her blouse was not. 

Realizing it was too late to turn back home and change she momentarily panicked as her mind fumbled for a solution. Driving further, salvation suddenly revealed itself in bright red letters as she pulled into the roadside Walgreens. Even though this was far enough away from home for anyone to recognize her, she still didn't want to take any chances of strangers starring at her stained outfit. She removed her blouse in the car at the parking lot, just before strutting into the pharmacy topped only in her barely legal tank-top. Better to be judged the slut then a slob she thought. 

She was on a mission headed in search of Tide Stain Remover. As she surveyed the aisles she felt countless eyes following her. She was focused on the task at hand and brushed off the stares attributing it all to her tight skirt and extra high heels. She crossed her arms as she walked; the store's constant freezing AC causing goosebumps on her bare skin. The spaghetti strap and plunging neckline of her tank top providing little protection against the harsh interior elements. 

Finally on a lower shelf of a far corner of the store, she bent over and reached for the miracle stain removal as a blast of cold air wrapped around her upper thighs. As soon as she stood upright she squirmed at an unexpected tugging. 

The sudden discomfort was wedged fabric caught between her bottom cheeks. More concerned about the discomfort and assuming the aisles were clear she only quickly glanced over her shoulder; reaching back and grasping for her skirt. Not feeling it where she expected it to be, she went on thinking it simply must have ridden up a bit. Her g-string had dug in and she had to sink her fingers deep and use some force to pluck it out from its trapped spot. As she attempted  to release the black elastic-like scrap of cloth, she flexed her cheeks and awkwardly tip-toed for a moment in order to readjust herself when she heard a familiar voice

"Tammy? Tammy! What are you doing out here?"

She turned to see her former boss staring wide eyed at her.

"Hi! What are YOU doing here?" she asked walking towards me and reaching in for a hug.

My eyes growing wider as I focused in on her nipples - standing at full attention poking through her barely-there tank-top. I hugged her tight; tighter than usual and she must have noticed as I felt her hard nipples rubbing against my stiff dress shirt.

"I just stopped by on my way home. I live out here now. What are you doing?" I asked not releasing the hug.

"Oh me? I was just getting… getting some last minute laundry supplies" she gently moved away and held up the stain removal between us.

"Why are you shopping way out here? Anyways, it is great to see you. You are looking... perky...perky as ever. Extra perky." I complimented fixated on her chest.

Realizing my focal point on her nearly sheer, attention-getting top and lack of bra she crossed her arms abruptly and looked away.

After my insistence of stalling small talk and some eventual uncomfortable (uncomfortable for her) silence she excused herself.

"OK Nice seeing you...all of you." I grudgingly bid farewell as she turned away and my eyes followed.

"Oh, you may want to get some of these too" I offered up a small box of dryer fabric sheets.

"Ahh...OK...Thanks...I guess...Bye…" she grabbed the box with a confused look and walked off uncomfortably and unknowingly.


She put down her half-empty latte on the check-out counter to dig through her large bucket purse in search of her small wallet. The cashier leisurely rang up the handful of items and suddenly stopped at the dryer sheets.

"Girl. Really. It's a little late for these. You are supposed to use them before you put on your clothes. These aren't going to get rid of the static cling now."

Tammy stared back at the cashier blankly then froze in realization. She looked down at her skirt and instantly her hands went to her backside where she felt partial exposed cheeks. 

"OhmaGawd!" she blurted out loud, loud enough for the half-dozen customers within earshot to turn around and stare at her. 

Her face quickly filled with pink upon realization that not only had she been showing off her nearly naked "perky" breasts, but thanks to static cling, she was showing off quite a bit of cheekiness. Further realization sank in of the view she must have given when she had bent over and when she had wedged out her panties giving her old boss an unforgettable view.


Hope you enjoyed that story and a reminder that I am looking for tales of embarrassment from my dear readers. Who's willing to share? Let's get rid of the winter blues together!
Come on who's with me?! 

If not, comments are always appreciated!


Amber Wolfe said...

When I need a good story to slip into, you never let me down Enzo! Purrrrr!

Hope you are doing well!


Enzo said...

Thanks Amber! The thought of being able to make you purr with a story alone makes me smile.

I'm glad you enjoyed the story as it is more of an everyday recount than the other more elaborate stories.

Hope you can catch up on the other posts soon.